ac·tu·al

Journal

How the fuck did I make it through high school? It was a goddamn trip and I’m so happy it’s over.

It was depressing, felt like it was never going to end. The teachers sucked. The students sucked. The atmosphere sucked. I didn’t learn anything useful besides the science courses, and most everything was a huge waste of time.

It’s not what people make it out to be, not even in the movies that paint it in a bad light – for me it was a depressive haze. People talked about me behind my back, as I walked by, they had nothing better to do – and it killed my self esteem.

Before I was in high school, nothing could stop me. My motivation was maxed out, and I wanted to change the goddamn world.

Nothing but high school could have killed that incredible spirit.

And when I say high school, I’m talking about the back stabbing bitches and the teachers who did the least, I’m talking about the people who poked my back fat when I was a freshman, the insecurity I felt when running during PE, I’m talking about having to breakup with ex boyfriends and dealing with seeing them around with new girls, the drama – the anxiety – the depression – all accumulating to create the shit expirience I had.

I’m hoping that I can just move on from that trauma and create a new life for myself. My actual life. The actual me.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s