October: Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Awareness, Domestic Violence, Humanist, Love, Peace

My story is a pretty interesting one, at least from my own perspective.

I lived a republican/christian/country life for thirteen years, almost fourteen, and I was very strong in those beliefs. I loved my father, he was my inspiration in life. He was a hard worker, he was an elder in my church. Yeah, he drank, he wasn’t a perfect man, but as I said so many times then “no one is really perfect”.

So I lived that life, believing what I was told.

It was spoon fed to me like medicine each night before bed.

They didn’t let me believe anything, but I never tried to because I felt like I was doing what was right.

All this was the case up until October 22nd, 2013.

I woke up that day from hibernation. I became me that day.

And I can never go back.

That was the day my mom pulled me aside and told me she was gonna get me out of there. She was going to set me free.

This may not make sense to you, my dear Reader, because I have yet to really talk about this. But being that it’s October, I feel it’s appropriate now.

I remember this day in 2007, it was summer, and I was living in a trailer as my parents started their business. If you’ve ever been in one, you’ll know that they have little storage, so everything we owned was boxed up, including my toys. But I decided to play with my toys that day, and I kind of wish I didn’t now because it’s scarred me. My parents had a small spat that day. My dad picked up the box, and he hurled it at my mom. Right in front of my sister and I. In that little trailer.

I will never forget that.

So many other things happened, I know they did, but I have blocked them out. I have forgotten, because dealing with that knowledge is too hard for a young girl.

Maybe one day I’ll let myself remember again.

But that day is not today.

Today, I am strong and I go on with my day, I remember to love with my hands and not hurt with them. I remember that words can bruise, and sticks and stone break bones and words fucking hurt too.

I am a survivor of Domestic Violence, and I want to raise awareness about it, because I had no idea what it was before my mom told me when we left my dad.

October 31st is more than just halloween to me, it’s the day I was liberated. It was the day I was set free from my dad, the last day he had to hurt me. He hasn’t since.

I am free from his cruel words and hands.

I am me.

I am a Women’s rights activist.

I am a Feminist.

I am a lover of people.

I am an Secular Humanist.

I am a peaceful person.

I love, but I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me.

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